Money Gift For The Wedding Couple (2009-08-11)
The black and white dinner plates that appear often on this blog are wedding favors KL received many years ago. Speaking of wedding, let's learn about the basic etiquette of attending a Japanese wedding namely: how you should dress and how much to give to the wedding couple.
First and foremost, your outfit.
When I see pictures of friends and relatives attending a wedding in Hong Kong wearing casual clothes which apparently is a widely acceptable behavior over there, I'm shocked. In here, it's a big no no. Male guests always wear formal (usually black) suits and females in pastel color formal or cocktail dresses, usually with a wrap around their shoulders, and matching shoes (older women wear formal suits or kimono). Most will also have their hair done in salons that morning and often than not, being made up there too. The bride and groom and their families treat this day with utmost solemnity and respect and guests are expected to do the same.
Now comes the next important part: monetary gift for the wedding
couple. The going rate for colleagues or "acquaintance-level"
friends is at minimum 10000-20000Yen/US$105-210 per person, bosses and
close
friends usually
give more.
Relax! Your "investment" doesn't go in vain. Since at
least 10000Yen is expected from each guest, the wedding couple will
have also
prepared wedding favors equivalent to the same amount or more. So
besides
a fabulous meal, guests usually take home a cake, kitchenware and/or
food stuff.
Besides the set of dinner plates and cups (in pretty gift box) KL
got from attending that wedding, he also received an entire 8-inch cake
(also in pretty Tiffany blue box and ribbon) and some other thing that
I forget. I'd say he got his money's worth from all that wedding
favors and a fantastic multi-course dinner.
One interesting thing to note: it's not common practice to invite
the guest's
entire family or even his/her spouse to the wedding, which I
think is an excellent idea. If I was invited to his colleague's
wedding, with the additional expense on a dress, shoes, salon, you're
looking at well over 500 bucks out of our pockets. I don't ever
want to be invited to a wedding here.
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